Ask the Axis! (by Beats)
by Sketch and Beats
Summary: The adventures of Beats and the Axis boys! This can't end well... Read to find out! :-D Rated T for... Well, for Beats. Human names will be used. And also, I don't own Hetalia. All rights to the characters go to the guy who created them. I know his name, I just can't spell it. I only own the story and myself.
1. Chapter 1

"Hi! Welcome to 'Ask the Axis!' Say hi guys!" Beats said, er, more like commanded.

"Hiya!" Italy said happily.

"Herro..." said Japan.

Unlike everyone else, Germany was being a pissypants today. "Hi." he grumbled, earning a glare from Beats.

"Oh Luddy lighten up. Not the readers fault Prussia ate all your wurst and drank all your beer." Beats said, annoyed at his behavior.

Germany sighed. "Don't call me zat. Jou vill refer to me as Germany, my real name, or Deutschland."

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Luddy Luddy Luddy. Problem?"

"Why jou little-"

"THE COUNTRY OF BEATSILVANIYA(1) IS NOT LITTLE! I CAN KICK YOUR SALTY GERMAN BUTT!" I said, about ready to bite his head off.

"Oh really?" Germany said, pulling his gun out.

"HELL YEAH BRING IT ON DEUTCHY!" I yelled, pulling out a bazooka and aiming it at Germany.

"Germany-san, Beats-chan, prease carm down." Japan said.

"But Kiku he started it!" I said.

"Prease?" Japan asked.

"Fine... But you owe me. Now I can't shoot anybody!" I sighed. Japan whispered something in my ear that made me go beet red and faint.

"Beats!" Germany said, catching me as I fell.

"Japan, what did you-a say to-a Beats?" the Italian asked.

"I tord her that I'd draw her a picture of a certian person shirtress." he stated, looking over at Germany who was tending to the unconscious me.

"Who?" Italy asked, not getting the hint.

Japan sighed, "He has bronde hair and brue eyes."

"Big-a brother France?"

Japan facepalmed. "No."

"America?"

"Try again Itary."

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ~! Doits-"

Japan covered his mouth before he could say it. If Germany knew, he'd kill Japan.

"Beats vake up! Zhey made bacon flavored ice cream!" Germany said, shaking her.

Japan walked over and poked Beats. "Beats-chan, they finarry made OtakuRand."

My head shot up. "HELL YEAH I GET A SHIRTLESS PICTURE OF WEST AND OTAKULAND OPENED!"

"VHAT?!"

" ^.^ Bye Germany!" I grabbed Japan and ran into my room, locking the door.

"OPEHN ZHIS DOOR ZHIS INSZANT!" Germany yelled, banging on the door.

"NEVAR!" I yelled, grabbing my spoon just in case he got in.

"Alright, thats all folks! PM me a question!"

"BEATS I VILL BREAK ZHIS DOOR DOWN!"

I'm going to die. ~_~

(1) Beats thinks she's the country of Beatsilvaniya.


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey guys, welcome back to 'Ask the Axis'. Japan and I are still in my room because I think Germany wants to kill us. Where is Sketch when i need her...?" I sighed at the absence of Sketch. She was at summer camp.

"BEATS OPEN ZHE DOOR!" Germany yelled. He may be cute, but he scares the crap out of me sometimes.

"Beats~! We-a have question~! And I'm totally-a not-a saying that-a so you and Japan-a will come out-a!" Italy said from outside the door.

"You lieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" I said in my best Zim voice. I'm the only one who can tell if there are any questions. *Beat's phone makes a ding-dong noise* "Ooo I got an email! I hope it's Spain! He owes me 130 tomatoes." I said unlocking my phone and checking my email. "Awwwwwwwwwwwww it's just a question." I grumbled. "Japan, you read it." I said, throwing the phone at Japan and falling face first on my bed, depressed it wasn't Spain with news on my tomatoes.

"Hai." Japan said. "It says:

Nanna-rer Frost:Hi Itary Hi Germany Hi Japan Sushi Is awesome ! and manga and  
stuff and Itary why do you rike pasta so much it strange anyway bye!" "Thank you for acknowledging manga and sushi Nanna-rer Frost-san."

"Thank you for the question bella~! But I-a like pasta so much because-a Grandpa Rome used-a to make it for-a me and Roma all the-a time~!" Italy said cutely.

"Italy how the flip did you get in here?"

"Germany picked the-a lock with his-a hair pin!"

"Okayyyyyyyy... WAIT NOOOOOOOOOOO!" I screeched, grabbing my spoon. Germany looked pissed.

"Beatssss~! I'm going to kill jou and Japan~!" He said, with a creepy rape face that would put England's to shame.

"I'm to young! I've never been to OtakuLand!"

"ZHAT'S NOT EVEN A REAL PLACE!"

"In my dreams it is~!"

"ZHAT DOESN'T COUNT YOU DUMMY!"

"I'M NOT A DUMMY! T_T"

Germany groaned. He still couldn't tell if I was bi-polar, or just crazy. "You're not a dummy. I'm sorry."

"Yay~!" I exclaimed, glomping him.

"I still vant to know vhy Japan is drawing a picture of me shirtless Beats."

I jumped off him and ran to the bathroom with my spoon and yelled, "JAPAN IF YOU TELL I'LL BURN ALL YOUR MANGA!"

"Sorry Germany-san, but I need my manga." Japan said, running away.

Germany looked over at Italy. "Italy... Do jou know?"

"ITALY IF YOU SAY A WORD I WILL THROW ALL THE PASTA IN THE WORLD IN THE OCEAN AND THEN FORCE YOU TO EAT IGGY'S FOOD!"

"Noooooooo Beats-a don't!"

"THEN RUN AWAY FROM THE GERMAN!"

Italy ran. Sometimes I wonder if I scare he and Japan.

* * *

~In Someplace Unknown~

"Werr, I know Beats-chan wirr forget to say this, so thank you Nanna-rer Frost for the question. Werr, see you next time, and as Beats-chan wourd say, R&R, and PM her a question!"(1)

(1) If you don't know who that was, I will spoon you.


	3. AUTHORS NOTE READ IT OR I WILL SPOON YOU

Okay, so here's whats happening. Apparently, the way I've been writing my story is all flipping wrong, so there will be a few changes.

1. I will no longer writing the story like this:

Beats: HELL YEAH BRING IT ON DUETCHY! *pulls out bazooka and aims it at Germany*,

Instead, I will be writing like this:

"HELL YEAH BRING IT ON DEUTCHY!" Beats exclaimed, pulling a bazooka from out of nowhere and aiming it at Germany.

That means more work for me... T_T

Germany: ^-^

PISS OFF CLOSET PERV!

Anyways, back to changes.

2. If you want to send in a question, you'll have to PM me, because any sort of interactive reveiw story is forbidden. Or something like that at least. Butttt, you can still review to tell me how shitty my story is.

3. I think I'm going to move this story to my other account, Musical Wonderland, but I'm not sure yet.

So... That's what's happening. Bai! ^.^


End file.
